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New York Daily Journal News Story!

Hey Angels! So we got another submission from a male author and he’s basically written something hilarious I think but I wanna have you guys check it out and give me your thoughts first. His note is below:

Hey Alexis. I’ve read most of your books when you were on Amazon and breaking the charts. I saw you were taking submissions on your blog and I thought I could do a better job. I’ve never published anything yet but I put this news article together based on some of your early stuff that I read. Let me know if it’s any good or you’d want to work together. Sincerely, (NAME REDACTED)

If you’re familiar with classic Alexis Angel then this should be entertaining. If you’re not, then I’ll put the books this relates to at the end of the news story. So here we go!

Billionaire World in New York City Shaken To It’s Core!

By Mona Cox, staff writer for the New York Daily Journal

New York City – The billionaire class that works, plays, and eats in New York City was shaken to its core today when the world famous restaurant Per Se, located in the Time Warner Center, announced that they were closing their restaurant to all further bookings. A spokesperson for the restaurant announced that they had been booked solid for the next 365 days.
“It’s not even that we’ve sold all our tables for dinner,” he said. “It’s that these billionaires have come in and rented out the entire restaurant on particular nights just so they can eat alone with their dining companion.”
A typical dinner at Per Se will easily cost $1000. It’s not uncommon for the restaurant to service just one seating of guests and guide them through an 8 course tasting menu paired with wines and cocktails and followed up with dessert.
“We have no need to even have a changing menu with a booking for the whole restaurant each night,” Head Chef Joseph Conrad said. “We’re just serving a billionaire and his alpha woman. The billionaire is obviously trying to get laid. There’s no doubt about it when they come in. They have flowers and the woman comes in and then they’re all over each other as they leave and get in a limo to go to the billionaire’s apartment at One57.”
In almost a cruel twist of fate, the apartment building One57 announced today that it would not be accepting any new applicants to move in, citing that every apartment was already purchased by a billionaire.
“I didn’t even know this many billionaires lived in New York City, and that they were all trying to live here,” Mark Corocoran, property manager for One57 said. “It’s like they read about us in a book or something.and all decided that they wanted to move here.”
New York City has in recent years been beseiged by a bevy of handsome, modelesque billionaires who haved all specifically moved into One57 and/or eaten at Per Se. They’ve purchased limousines that many New Yorker’s have mentioned rock side to side when idling in traffic, as they’ve engaged in sexual relationship with similarly driven alpha females.
“You can’t throw a rock without hitting a billionaire nowadays, you know?” Joel Norman, who works in Midtown Manhattan said. “Used to be they were just a bunch of old geezers who made their money. Nowadays they’re all handsome, rich, and cut. They bench 200 pounds and love taking off their shirts randomly. I’ll be walking into Starbucks and there’s a billionaire taking off his shirt and just fucking standing there waiting for someone to take a picture. I just wanna get a cup of coffee and this dude is standing there shirtless. If he wasn’t there I’d get a fucking donut but instead I just get the rice cake.”
It remains unclear what the recent upswing in billionaire activities will do to this city, but one thing is clear. There are many more billionaires being created. And they’re all coming to the city. Only time will tell what the effects are.

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Natalie Has Arrived!

Oh. My. God.


Natalie Knight has arrived. We picked her up this morning. She’s over her dude and they’ve done some sort of paperwork (I forgot) but she is ready to party and get down.
This is going to be an insane weekend I can already tell.
We started drinking cosmos today like an hour ago and talking about things we want to do to the store. Lana is like “just don’t get drunk and break the store”

lol I hope we don’t but we’re thinking of some amazing deals we want to do. But more than that we’re thinking of where we’re gonna go party tongiht. And whether we should invite Gym Bros. I mean I’m not tied down to IT Guy and he knows we’re both casual right now and I’m totally okay taking one of the Gym Brothers and giving Natalie one. She’s totally down to also but there’s also the fun of finding someone new.
So. Many. Possibilities.

So I asked Natalie how long she’s able to stay in town for and she just shrugs and is like however long you want to have me before you get tired of me because I’m kinda a party girl right now.

And I’m like oh my god you’re my sister. Don’t get me wrong I love Lana but Lana makes me do responsible things like work a lot and wake up at a reasonable hour and not sleep in and remind me if I have an early morning meeting when I’m out drinking or with friends or having friends over.

I mean it’s good and all but I’m a writer! I write for a living! And I’m like if I’m gonna be creative Im gonna live like a creative person which means try and experience a lot of stuff. But then Lana is like yeah but you’re also a business owner and several thousand angels rely on you and the things we provide form DLA to books make people’s day and that’s a responsibility. Then Lana says something that I can’t respond back to because she’s right. she says “That’s what you always say. You always make the point that we have a sacred duty and a sacred trust to our readers and the people who come to the store, even if they come to look because we bring joy to people’s lives” and I’m like fine grumble grumble lets be responsible.

So Natalie is like that but she’s also like girl lets go be crazy this weekend. It’s doing a service too because then we can write better stories. And Lana can’t argue with that because Natalie is right too.

So I Guess it’s like both are right but it’s all about moderation.

Anyways, so Natalie and Lana and I are going out in a big way tonight. This is gonna be epic. And don’t worry. I will be telling you all about it. No cliffhangers unless I’ve already written a whole bunch and I find a natural stopping off point.

Tell me your weekend plans Angels! This weekend is gonna be amazing!!!!

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The store is back!

So basically from Thursday onwards to over the weekend you probably (if you came to the store) got a message like “this store no longer exists” lol

Sorry I don’t mean to laugh. But yeah we posted a message on Dirty Lil Angels that basically said the store was going in for an upgrade and there would be several days where it would be down.
So if you saw the message on DLA, hopefully you didn’t have a heart attack – just boredom like me.
But if you didn’t see the message, then please note that going forward we will post all important messages and announcements in DLA so that people know what’s happening.

The address to DLA is of course:

So this basically came about because IT Guy came by and we had a long talk (Lana me and him) and he basically said that the site was down to go down again because literally too many people were requesting processes and doing things on it.

Basically…he and Lana started talking technical stuff and I just looked at his face and arms and his crotch after a certain point.

By the time Lana and he decided the best course of action was that we migrate the site from one type of server to another, I was really horny.

So Lana was like “alexis you’re in charge of messaging” and all I could think of (I had already had three glasses of wine because we were celebrating releasing Sarah vs. Stepfather) was massages. Not messages.

Anyways so IT Guy went to his apartment to begin the process and I snuck out of our apartment and went to his to blow him. One thing led to another and I am trying to put his cock in my mouth and he’s like “wait alexis let me finish this real quick or else it’s going to take over 7 days.”

So I dunno about you but when a guy says no to me…I get hornier.

Now I’m paying at him and kissing his neck and then he does something crazy.

He just picks me up. Like a doll. And I’m just in shock because the dude picked me up. He walks me over to the kitchen counter and deposits me gently.

“stay,” he commands. “daddy has to go finish some work.”

He might as well have melted my panties off.

Afterwards he got done setting everything up and he comes back and picks me up again and this time takes me to his bed and lays me down and then proceeds to literally own my body and use it for his pleasure. I’m just in so much surreal bliss-ville that I’m caught up in the waves.

Afterwards Lana asked me if I had done the messaging and I said I posted in DLA. She asked if I sent an email to my newsletter and I was like oops no. But it was too late because the store was already offline. She asked if I told Nat and Daph and I was like uhmm…no I forgot.

So she was a bit annoyed but it passed. So I’m sorry Angels. I thought I’d be able to email afterwards but if you don’t have a working website its usually pretty risky to send emails. Also all our email accounts went down.

So what’s changed on the store?

It should be waaaay more robust on the backend now. Which means we’ll be able to offer more bells and whistles. Things that you’ll all like. I know that we release a book a day now. So we’ll be able to increase that frequency as we get more authors. We were having to cap gift cards. Now we can let anyone who wants a gift card get one. Other fun programs are coming too that will help you save!

The site should be working as per normal. If you find something that needs fixing let us know. If you’re the first person and it’s an issue we didn’t know about, you scored yourself a nice lil reward babe!

That’s all for me! Talk soon Angels!

Oh if you haven’t checked out the latest Girls Vs. Love installment check it out today!



Ok love you angels!

Posted on 27 Comments

Lana has moved in!

So a lot of things to talk about tonight before I go to bed.

Firstly, Lana moved in. Trust me, it was insane. I think she’s gonna write about it Sunday so I’m not gonna spoil her thunder. Because at first she was like WTF and then we just started laughing. It’s definitely going to be a bit of a transition.

Also…I’m pleased to introduce to you…Sinful Selections. I asked yesterday if people liked it and the response was overwhelmingly good! So…chapters will be uploaded every Tuesday. The first several story lines are up now…go crazy making decisions. If you don’t know what Sinful Selections is…imagine a love story babe. Except here you make the choices. Lets say you meet a guy and he smiles at you. Do you want to throw your shoe? Or take off your skirt?

Daphne and I came up with the idea and we’ve put it together. We’re also writing it together and we’re excited to see your reactions! I love it. And the best part is…we keep adding to it! So go here to Sinful Selections and make your fate babe!

Lastly, I want to tell you, that aside form every Tuesday updates to Sinful Selections, I have a MAJOR surprise for you coming this week. It’s so massive that I can barely keep it to myself. It’s so huge. I’m literally shaking. So I am gonna tell you soon!

Anyways babes I love you all. Tomorrow I see what a full day living with Lana (who is asleep) is gonna be like!

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Author Interview

Howdy Angels!

So, Daphne Dawn is going to get credentials for the store tomorrow, but before that, Alexis and I got on a chat with her to make sure we caught all the pertinent information. This was a while ago, but I just had to share this with you guys because it was too funny. I’m going to be living with this woman, Alexis, and I’m excited!

Interview Excerpt:

Lana: Hey Daphne!
Daphne: Hey Lana!
Alexis: Hi
Daphne: Hey Alexis! Long time no speak.
Alexis: Yup.
Lana: So Daphne we just have a few questions to make sure that our store will be a good fit for you, if that’s okay.
Daphne: Sure, not a problem.
Alexis: I’ll go first!
Lana: Okay, Alexis. I mean we have a script.
Alexis: Ya, ya, whatever. Ok Daphne I gotta ask. When you cum, do you see spots?
Daphne: Uhm, what? Haha.
Alexis: You know, do you see stars? Or see spots?
Lana: Alexis dear…
Daphne: Not really?
Lana: Because that means you’re having a heart attack.
Alexis: (typing)
Lana: Let’s go with this question, instead. Daphne, what is your favorite book, if you had to choose?
Daphne: That’s a hard one. I’d have to say 4 Men of the House even though the Other Brother and Marriage Mistake are such runaway bestsellers.
Alexis: Wait. You wrote that with Natalie Knight, right?
Daphne: That’s right.
Alexis: Have you and Natalie ever….you know?
Daphne: No, I don’t. What?
Lana: Oh god.
Alexis: Have you two ever fucked?
Daphne: Oh, dear.
Lana: Oh no.
Daphne: Actually, I’m pretty conservative in my normal life. I don’t get much of a chance to do things like that.
Alexis: Ok but would you?
Lana: Alexis…
Daphne: I don’t know that I’ve ever thought about it.
Alexis: Like what if you were drunk?
Daphne: I don’t usually drink
Alexis: (Typing)
Lana: Ok, lets get back on track. Daphne, how often do you think you’d release with us?
Daphne: I think once a month at least. Maybe more if it’s one of those long stories that you guys do, telling it in parts.
Alexis: Do you like get yourself off after finishing a book?
Daphne: What? haha?
Alexis: Like I usually play with my vibe to celebrate after a book is done u know?
Daphne: Don’t you do that anyways? I read your newsletter…
Alexis: Ya but this is a special one. Like I finished a book. Boom
Daphne: I usually make a pie.
Alexis: Ooooh. Do you let your hubby fuck it? Like in American Pie????
Daphne: …..

It’s a wonder Daphne Dawn ever ended up bringing her stuff to our store. I was chuckling, shaking my head, and letting my mouth hang open all at once.

But she’s Alexis. And I love her.

And I love you.

Thank you for having me in your family, Angels. I love it here.

Posted on 10 Comments

New Roommate?

So Angels guess what?

You guys sent so many well wishes and comments to Lana about being an angel that we went out this evening and this is what the convo kinda went like:

Lana: Shouldn’t we be writing chapters for the next book?
Alexis: Babe let your hair down okay?
Lana: I can’t. We need to finish up these books we started
Alexis: Ya ya hey is that guy staring at me?
Lana: What guy?
Alexis: Turn around and look at him, but do it without turning around, okay?
Lana: WTF
Alexis: Anyways, so are you more comfortable now? You get that we never really broke up as a team right?
Lana: Yeah listen I’m sorry…but what guy? What happened to Technology Man?
Alexis: It’s IT Guy and he’s amazing and I might put out next time.
Lana: Already?
Alexis: Hello, I was trying to seduce him remember? Besides its gonna be Date number 3
Lana: Yeah, listen…what do you think now that Mr. Lana Angel and I are separated and my 4 month lease is expiring that I…
Alexis: Why don;t you move in? I have two bedrooms!!
Lana: Yeah, that’s what I was going to say
Alexis: Except I said it first! Hey that dude is staring at me
Lana: Let me look (turning around)
Alexis: OMG! You turned around
Lana: He’s not staring at you
(Dude walks over to our table)
Dude: Hello
Lana: (To Alexis) So what do you say?
Alexis: Yes
Dude: That’s a yes?

And that’s a whole new story I think.

Check out my new series on the Featured Deals page!!! My release. All me.

I’ve been working on this ALL BY MYSELF. NOT ME AND LANA! Finally I have my own release oh my god it feels so good. Oh man.

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Oh. My. God.

So yesterday was my date with IT Guy. He was super fucking respectful when I was trying to hit on him and I found out it was because he thought I was still together with WineBar.
So I was like okay if he was that respectful it’s going to be a low maintenance date. I don’t really need to do much to prepare. Just go as is. We’ll probably go somewhere quiet and have a conversation and maybe he’ll hold my hand and that’s the farthest he’s gonna go because he might be a bit mild mannered.

Fuck. Was I wrong.

Angels, I’m just now getting the strength to sit up in my chair.

So, I decided to wear something pretty. I actually didn’t get my hair done but I straightened it and I did my makeup.

And I met him at Bourbon & Branch.

“You wanna drink?” he asked me and I happily nodded my head. We got some really strong drinks and I’m like meh I’m out having a good time. We talked and talked and talked and talked and each time I ordered another drink.

Dinner was somewhere fun. We went to Sens and had more cocktails. I’m like okay I’m drinking so I’m gonna load up on carbs so I had the potato gnocchi and I’m scarfing it down but we share a bottle of wine and then we go to get more drinks at this bar. Somewhere along the way in the back of the Uber I’m making out with him and my hands are in his pants and when we get to the bar he’s like a perfect gentleman and he’s helping me.

We meet some of his friends and they order bottle service. It’s vodka. So I’m drinking now and I’m dancing and we’re dancing together all of a sudden. I’m grinding against him and we’re getting pretty heated and he’s feeling me up.

We go outside for a walk because I’m sweating and we make out some more.

It’s 2 am and we all decide to go to his friends house in Russian Hill and more booze is had by everyone. I’m drunk. I’m giggling into IT Guy’s neck and I’m clinging onto him. The world is spinning but then we eat Carl’s Jr because I am so drunk and I eat half a burger and I’m stuffed. Then for some reason I help IT Guy eat his burger too even though my burger is sitting right there and it was the same one. Whatever.

“I’m just gonna make sure you’re alright,” he tells me afterwards at my door. I’m dragging him to my bed but he doesn’t get in.

“Take off your clothes,” I tell him all super tipsy and he’s like “I’m not gonna fuck you for the first time when you’re wasted, Alexis.”

And I’m like awwww.

But my hand eye coordination is like shot to hell and I’m like okay then unzip me.

Then I’m like “take off my bra, it’s hard.”

That’s the extent to my ability to seduce. I don’t think he even got a look because I plopped onto the bed.

“Come here,” I say to him and he kisses me and it’s so nice and then he gets up.

“I’ll check on you tomorrow,” he tells me and I’m like whoa he just passed up sloppy drunk sex and then I pass out as soon as he goes out the front door.

I must have passed out at like 6 am. I woke up at 5 pm. I wasn’t human till like just recently.

Poor Lana. We were supposed to write chapters today. She did hers but now I’m behind.

IT Guy called twice but I was dead to the world apparently. I’ll see him tomorrow when I’m back to normal. We’re supposed to have lunch.

But whew. Talk about a whirlwind huh?