Posted on 18 Comments

Moving Into the Angel Den….

Hey Angels.

So I figured something as momentous as moving in with Alexis deserved a post. Because…well you’ll find out.

So Alexis used to have a dog. She’ll talk about that later I’m sure, it’s not my story to tell. But I don’t understand how the dog couldn’t have made life difficult for her. I’ll explain why.

So I arrive bright and early in the morning with a small birthday cake because my friend is taking her special day to help me move in.

Alexis takes the cake and gives me coffee. Then we look at the huge U-haul that I brought with me.

Then, as if on command, she almost claps her hands and three men appear out of nowhere. Okay, maybe she didn’t clap her hands, but it was freaky. She introduces them to me as IT Guy, Gym Rat, and Gym Bro. Now I know they have real names but this is Alexis so this is what she calls them in real life. I’m a bit stunned.

Then Alexis instructs her harem (there’s no better word for what I was seeing) and they proceed to flex and grunt and roar. Then they all go and start picking things up from the U Haul and bringing it inside.

“Just don’t open that closet,” is all Alexis keeps on saying for a bit. IT Guy sets up my computer and electronics. Gym Bro and Gym Rat bring my suitcases and light furniture like my bed and nightstand in. They also bring my television.

I bring in my clothes. I don’t want an Alexis man to be running his hands over my lingerie, if you know what I mean.

“Alexis I need to hang my coat,” I tell her.

“Wait!” Don’t open that closet, she says, referring to the hallway closet.

But I open it, because how bad can it be. I mean I get it. She probably stuffed some things in there when she was getting ready for me. We’ve seen each other naked at the spa. I’m able to handle a closet.

I open it.

First, the clothes fall out. The closet ceiling is about 10 feet tall. So I have clothes falling on me from the ceiling.

Then shoe boxes come tumbling down.

Then some pots and pans.

Some more clothes.

Cups. A plate?

A box of Apple Jacks. A sweater. And an old iphone.

“You opened it!!!” Alexis says with a pout.

We spend a good five minutes laughing. And then she asks Gym Bro to put it all back in.

This is going to be an insane life. I can already tell.

18 thoughts on “Moving Into the Angel Den….

  1. Sounds scary. I can just see it now all that crap falling all over u. When they say don’t open they mean don’t open! Yikes!!!! Well I hope u settle soon and things start running smoothly! And u all get into a groove that is completely and utterly flawless. Good luck and getting situated. I’ve gotta get to my grandsons 4th bday party! The real work starts tomorrow!!! Laters

  2. OMG, I literately can’t stop myself from laughing something silly after reading the “closet” incident… but I’m glad that you finally moved into your best friends crib!

  3. Oh my gosh, I can just see everything come tumbling out…lol. Hope the pots and pans didn’t get you on the head. That closet sounds like one of my spare rooms, anything I haven’t gone through yet is thrown in there and it’s now been over a year and I still haven’t gotten in there to finish up. I know you two will work everything out and hope you have a blast being besties and roommates.

  4. Sounds like my bedroom. I have an organized mess. I know where most things are and can find the others.

  5. I totally get that but I’m on a reorganization spree, not saying I’m getting rid of everything just getting additional storage space. Like my new shoe rack for my closest that can hold 50 pairs of shoes my old one that held 36 was completely over stuffed.

  6. How come there’s never a hidden camera around to catcg life’s funniest moments?

  7. Oh my gosh, how hysterical. I thought I was bad. Alexis has me beat with the bowl and Apple Jacks. Life will be interesting and comical at least.

  8. Kind of like Monica telling Chandler not to open the closet on friends lmao

  9. I think you’re in for a wild ride Lana! Try to have fun with it!?

  10. Reminds me of the old”Friends” episode where Monica has the locked closet and Chandler opens it and …?

  11. OMG Too funny!??
    And seriously, they were all there together? ??

  12. So funny!!!! But what did you expect!! You have moved in with the irrepressible ALEXIS ANGEL!!!
    Love you both!

  13. Oh oh. What happened to doggy Winebar?


  15. OMg, Alexis you are hot mess!!! LMAO!!! I read the blog to my sister and we both are sitting her kitchen laughing. I just love you guys.

  16. I hope it’s ok to ask this, not sure if I missed something somewhere, but “where is Mr. Lana Angel???

    1. You can go back in the blog to about half a month ago to get an idea.
      Long story short, he sounded like one of those manipulative controllers, but the only one who could really say is Lana, of course.

  17. Wait a minute, Alexis calls the guys these names to their faces, omg, I thought she only called them that to us. Apple Jacks, a cup and plate, it should have been a bowl and spoon lol. Totally awesome!!!!!!

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