Ok so things have been a little wild and we’re sorry about that. Interviews are coming soon.
So I think Lana told you that the big DC trip is coming soon? All week we’re getting ready for that of course. But there was one more thing.
So Lana’s mom turned 52 last year. She’s coming up on 53.
She’s been married… twice. Those were some rough divorces.
Honestly it’s all so sad. I know that Lana was really disheartened too and like with her own divorce? It was scary.
I mean we’re big girls who love their moms. We don’t even mind how we turn into them (like how we’re doing a 30 minute meals contest on the blog soon lol like that’s definitely something our moms would approve of). But getting divorced was sooper hard for Lana to deal with but she got through it.
Of course her mom was like hey I’ve done this twice.
So Lana’s mom called her two days ago and she was like, I am so lonely.
So fucking lonely were her exact words.
She never asks for anything but she asked me and Lana to fly out and keep her company because she was having a rough time.
Well so much as she was upset on the phone and I said we should come see you, she said yes, and Lana’s on Kayak booking a flight ASAP.
Mom’s totally come first. Shout out to lovely Margaret, so sorry to hear your Mom’s birthday is coming up and she’s not with you. I can’t even imagine.
So Lana’s mom needed some serious cheering up. While she wanted to eat icing and talk when we got there I told her, ok no icing we’re going to a bar.
Lol seriously though!
So before I forget haha because it is a wild story, Kim Vs. Stepbrother has been added to Angel Access!
K so we get there and we all fix our hair and makeup and put on new outfits.
Lana’s like, omg my mom would never listen to me but she listens to you, what twilight zone shit is this?
Haha I’m Alexis Angel, I’m magic right?
So Lana’s mom, her name is Pam, is like ok so I asked a guy out at work. I thought no biggie this will be great. We’ve both flirted.
And he proceeds to tell me how he’s actually in love with this girl that he saw sleeping outside of the bank where they work.
So what the hell is going on right?
Pam is like what the fucking hell is going on. He proceeds to talk about how she’s a junkie but really wants to take care of her kids. Lana’s mom is so pissed, she’s like seriously, the last man on earth is gonna pick his hand over me!!! WTFFFFF!!!
So yeah we did lots of drinking and she’s showing us how she tried Match. Tinder. Lana couldn’t convince her to try Bumble. I was like meet men in bars, we’ll help you out.
But like I realize Lana’s mom has a totally great point.
She can’t date anyone else at work. She doesn’t have a bunch of hot guys beating down her door.
So how do you meet guys and date after 50? Like Pam said she’s not looking to just hook up so that’s why the apps fucking blow. Lol that’s how she said it too bc she’s hilarious like that.
But really Angels can we help her out? I hate to see Lana’s mom so discouraged, and I know that going to bars every night isn’t her idea of fun. Like she went with us and we had fun but bars aren’t where everyone meets their soulmate.
Can you offer some advice?
Thanks Angels!
LOL Alexis yes my mom listens to you. But I’m so glad you asked the Angels for advice… wasn’t sure what to tell her really 🙂
I really feel for her because I am in the same position. Some of my friends are also. It isn’t easy once you’re over 50. I have been divorced over 10 years. I was married over 31 years when my ex said he wanted a divorce.
I tried the different dating sites 3 times. I was 56 the first time and what a joke. I ended up with boys (ages 20+ to 40+) wanting to date me because they heard that older women can really suck dick. Yes, that is exactly what they told me. ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well, I went out with them (not all of them) and it was awful. So I quit and concentrated on getting my life in order and moved closer to family and friends.
Five years later (now I’m 62) I decided to try again. This time I went on POF and Zoosk. Another disaster. I got the young men again and this time men closer to my age. Now, these men who were closer to my age were really old. What I mean is that they acted old. I though no way in hell was I going to date a guy who shuffled his feet and didn’t want to pay for a date. I couldn’t handle it . Once again I thought this is not for me and quit.
Sooo, 1 1/2 years later I decided WTF. One more time. Let’s try again. Now I’m 64. I decided to stay away from POF because all I got on that site was guys who wanted booty calls. I went on Elite Singles (expensive), Zoosk (I paid for 3 month this time) and Bumble. What a difference. I got guys closer to me age. Some were ok and some were really old (in mind and body). I was finely able to actually date and decide if they were worth a second date or having a relationship with. I felt more in control of my dating life and actually, more control of having a relationship. I wanted to now have an actual relationship with someone. Everything just felt right. Maybe the stars were lining up, I don’t know but finally I met a few men, not boys, who were worthy of a relationship. Does it mean I want to get married again. Nah. I just want a relationship with a man who is going to treat me like I should be treated.
Well, after all this time I found someone. Our relationship is new – only a couple of weeks but it feels so right. I got off the dating sites and decided that if this doesn’t work, that was it. I am happy being by myself. I have support of my family and friends.
Through all this, I have learned several things. You have to first love yourself and find some inner peace. If you don’t, you’ll never be happy with others very long. Remember, they are not responsible to make you happy. That only can come from you. You are responsible for your own happiness. I feel that if I find someone for a long term relationship that’s great. If not, that’s ok. I am happy with being just me.
I know this is long but here it is. Lana’s mom is not happy and she is lonely. She is not where she should be. She has not found inner peace and happiness within herself. She needs to find that first. That journey will take a while but in the end, it is so worth it. Then she will eventually find someone who is worthy of a relationship with her and not just someone who wants her for sex – on their terms (by the way, I had those also and finally kicked them to the curb). I have a feeling that she really wants to find someone to have a long term relationship. Believe this, the older we are, the harder it is to find someone. I’m 64 but still very active. I go to the gym, I dance around and have a good time. I don’t want an old man. There is a saying that my girlfriends say, “most older men want a purse or a nurse or both”. Sorry, that is not for me.
Missy don’t take this in a bad way but your comment made me cry. My momma still hasn’t seen the store (lol so unfair considering she reads romance!) but I really want to show her this comment. Your comment is so valuable and helpful. I’m so happy to hear that you have peace <3333 and thank you so much taking the time to tell your story. You're truly an Angel!
First a shout out to Pam and Happy Birthday (belated). My mom would have been 90 this year, but she passed in 2007.
Anyhoo, I was down when my husband passed in 2013. I felt really lonely. So after about a year, I went online to Our Time and Big Beautiful People. I met a couple of men and talked with a few others but I found my current BF of four years at Our Time, a site for people over 50. He is 66 and I’m 65. So far it has worked out well. Hopefully, Lana’s mom can also find someone, but please be careful. There are so many jerks and assholes out there. There are also some very nice and caring men. Good luck and keep us up to date on what’s happening.
There are dating sites specifically people over 50!!! When my daddy died I believe (it’s been a long hard road without him so I don’t count the years) 12 years ago, after my mom had grieved and felt ready, she found a couple sites and found a good guy that she’s now married to. Generally we love P.J. But they do live a bit farther away than we’d like and rarely see them.
I agree with the comments try a dating site specifically designed for over 50s although there not for everyone. Maybe it might help Pam to try to get involved in some new interests, leaping out of her comfort zone, getting out an about and meeting new people could help with the loneliness too, you never know she could meet someone completely out of the blue. Good luck Pam in whatever adventures you find xx