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So the sky is orange but…the website is getting upgraded!

Hey Angels,
The site has been dragging ass lately, to borrow a southern phrase from Lana (I think that is southern, right?) butttt there will be a big upgrade coming!
Here is San Francisco the sky has been orange. My phone camera keeps autocorrecting it so I can’t show a picture but they’re all over the news!
I keep telling my parents in Fresno to stop gardening because the air is so toxic!
We’ve been getting these huge headaches and it put a damper on our book releases but new stories are coming after our upgrade this week.

Thanks for your patience Angels and I hope you’re staying safe

xoxo
Alexis

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Things We Learned During Quarantine

Hey Angels!

I’m so glad the blog is back! We’ve totally realized a few things while it was out during this time. 1) We are so totally just a bunch of over-sharers lol. Without being able to share to people we don’t know what to do with ourselves. I mean Lana and I are telling each other things that we went through and we’re like we already knew this and then realizing that we need to tell the blog so that we can actually tell someone.

Number 2 thing that we realized is this. If you have sex with someone at work, you need to be able to laugh about it together before you either do it again or not do it again. So we had some really dirty escapades between Lana and Daphne and me. It was pretty hot. But at first we were like uhmm do we say anything more about this? And then Jose Cuervo decided to invite us for a party and we did shots of tequila (because what else is there to do during quarantine) and we started laughing about it and having fun and things became a lot more chill.

Number 3 thing that we learned. Working remotely sucks when you’re used to collaborating. That’s right. Working from home is fun and all if you’re like okay I don’t have to wear pants but a part of our fun doing the store is that for example I get to help one of the girls with her makeup and maybe they want to borrow something from my closet. So until we all moved into the same building that was totally not doable and now it’s a lot of fun.

Number 4 thing we learned is kinda clutch. And that is when you work with your friends sometimes you’re not really working at all but getting things done because you’re just having a lot of fun. As long as everyone is picking up their weight and there are clear lines of command it’s a lot of fun. What we do is have clear lines of command for certain aspects of the store.

Number 5 thing we learned. Quarantine was a great time to get in shape. All put together, I think we’ve gotten really fit all around. For me, I’ve quit vaping. I don’t smoke anymore. I just stick to alcohol lol. But the cravings are really gone and that’s because I work out twice a day now lol. I’m so into feeling the tiredness in my body that I can’t think of smoking. I guess that’s a good thing considering a respiratory illness is haunting the whole world.

So that is just a small number of the things I have learned. Tell me what you’ve learned during the March to July period that the blog was on hiatus?

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Quarantinis, baking, and the bar on the balcony… oh and FaceTime Dates!

Hey Angels,

Alexis has kicked us off, letting you all know that our big, broken, beautiful blog is back. And boy have we missed it. Alexis has been working hard to get that back together AND I saw her working on a new book. She is, as always, totally #goals!

I’ve been baking. Like so much baking. I had a pantry full of goods already because I believe in being very stocked and I’m a big couponer. Once I moved to California, the price of groceries probably aged me ten years, but at least when the groceries cost more, then the coupons are higher value.

Baking-wise, I’ve made a few hundred messes and maybe about half as many good things. I’m actually not good at baking? I cook very well, thank you very much, but I am all about experimenting and doing what feels good. Well, baking isn’t like that. You have to know what you’re doing and stick to a recipe. That’s really never worked for me.

So I decided to perfect the quarantini! The one thing I really didn’t have stocked up in my pantry?

Booze.

Especially when you can’t take Alexis Angel to a bar. Lord, have mercy on us all!

So a quarantini consists of what’s on sale that also the Instacart shopper can find and pairs well with the booze of choice that could be found. I’ve been working out a lot to counteract both the bread and the fact that I’ve been drinking fruit nectars with tequila and a splash of club soda for some sparkle. 

What are you drinking nowadays? I think I’ve drank every hard root beer that my grocery store stocks. I still find myself liking tequila the best or getting those awesome canned seltzers like Bon Viv or White Claw. Smirnoff makes these Rose variety packs that are ahhhhhhmazing. Seriously, when they are in stock, they’re the best. But for some reason I can’t find them on instacart but I place a request. Being the organized one you better believe that I have a photo and description and everything ready for placing a custom request in Instacart lol!

Our neighbors and us too have been getting out on our balconies in the evenings and chatting over drinks and music. We all tune into the same radio station or try out Pandora stations and stuff and just talk. How is your family? How’s work? Explaining to some of our neighbors what we do was not my proudest moment.

That night, I happened to have run out of club soda so I was drinking this vodka seltzer that I found. I drank the whole pack and it has way higher an alcohol percentage than the other stuff and hoooboy, I was D-R-U-N-K. So I told everyone that I produced very creative smut that is all the fantasies that by the time I’m done, you didn’t know you had and you couldn’t get rid of. Lol. Not too bad. But what we do at the store… it’s… unique.

But heyyyy I have about a thousand emails that say you want to know what’s going on with me and Aiden! The answer is… we facetime almost every day now. It started as just a way to chat. We even were sharing things we were cooking.

But I’m fucking horny. I said it. I want dick and I can’t get to it! So I have been saying the naughtiest stuff on Facetime to at least see what I can’t have. I think my fingers are wrinkly and pruny… 

Lol I think I’m oversharing. But, uhm… so I have been wondering if I wanted to get more serious with Aiden. He seems like the real deal. But this is the worst time to try to start a relationship, right?

But all that time we were talking, it made me want him more, but it made me care about him more.

So is dating long distance the way things are now just crazy or what? Let me know what you think.

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After A Four Month Hiatus, The Blog Is Back!

Hey Angels,

This is really a short post. But we’ve finally gotten everything worked out to be able to bring the store back from the bodyblow it took when we had to deal with everything thats been going on for the last few months.

We’ve had a journey, that’s for sure, but one thing I think can be safely attested to and that is that the store is stronger now than it was before.

Look for some exciting things in the next few weeks and months – to take our minds off of the world spinning out of control lol!

Alexis

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Whoops…We’re Here!

For a brief period of time this morning (on the West Coast, your afternoon on the East Coast!) our site was down. Our servers literally overloaded because of the sheer number of readers. Sorry about that.

We’ve upgraded our server power, Paige took care of everything – sorry about that.

Hope everyone is staying safe. Welcome to all the new Angels who have sent us emails and commented, thank you. We’re so happy to be part of your day during this tough time.

Lana won’t stop baking and canning (I had no idea it wasn’t just as simple as putting stuff in a can. She said something about me being a wicked city woman and laughed) but I’m borrowing the oven for two hours to dry some fresh mint that a neighbor brought over since they grow a ton and Google says drying at 180 degrees in the oven for two hours is good. So Lana is zesting lemons and making batter and like watching my timer cooper close haha.

Are you cooking a lot? Lana’s insisted that I learn more and I had dabbled in the past but she likes really knows stuff and has been teaching me. It’s been a great way to spend time together and talk about story ideas.

Last night we even used some canned extra thick coconut cream and made Pina coladas and talked about what to write next while we played Chess. Lana had never played before so I got to teach her something too!

I’m lucky to have her as a roommate and best friend, for sure.

Stay Safe Angels, hugs and kisses and lots of love!

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Light In Darkness

Hey Angels!

So the store had an update yesterday but in the middle of it all, I guess in the last two weeks the world has changed?

At first we were just as scared as everyone else. 

But we got a bunch of emails that kept saying the following. 

This blog and our books provided them the strength to go on. 

That it allowed them the ability to smile for a little bit in the middle of anxiety and worry about the world and their loved ones. 

So we’ve resolved a few things. 

We’re going to make sure the blog keeps going to provide you guys the ability to smile or escape for a little bit. 

We will keep the light on. And try to help with everyone else guide all of us through the darkness. 

Stay safe Angels!

Alexis

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Hey Angels

Sorry for the radio silence, the store is undergoing a big server upgrade and then there will be an update here on the blog as to what we’ve all been up to as well as a bunch of new releases.
We shouuuuuuld be fully operational again tomorrow. Will keep you posted.
Stay safe out there Angels <3

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Being there for Lana

Hey there, Angels!

I’ve heard you’ve been asking about me and my relationship with Lana. You’re all curious, right? 

I went to her house and asked her to have breakfast with me. It was a surprise, so when she opened the door, she wanted to run back in and almost closed the door to my face. 

I smiled and handed her the roses in my hands. I didn’t really care about what she looked like in the morning with her hair looking like a bird’s nest. I like her for who she is and not for what she looks like. She’s very gorgeous. 

She didn’t want to go out, so I ended up cooking breakfast for her. I asked about her days without me, and she answered like her usual. But it looked to me as if she had an internal debate. 

I didn’t want to force her to tell me things because I respect her. But the curiosity was killing me, and I wanted to hear it from her no matter what. 

In the end, she spilled the beans. 

“It’s like this… uh, I’ve been struggling with different sides of my nature. I mean, I’m not a playgirl. But I have the urge to have fun with Alexis, to be just like her? Is that bad?” she asked. 

I could see the doubt and worry on her face. 

“I’m supposed to be a serious person, and I’m looking for the one… but…” she added as she bit her lips. 

My eyes followed the movement of her mouth, but I fought the urge to do something. 

I smiled at her and decided to be the guy that I thought I would never be. I was even surprised by my decision. 

I grabbed her hands. “I’m here for you, Lana. I’ll always be. If you need to talk, then, you can tell me.” 

She stayed silent as she looked at me, surprised. It seemed that she didn’t expect my answer. 

But I think I made the right decision. What do you think, Angels?

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The real deal with Aiden

Hey Angels! 

I’ve been keeping my silence about Aiden because, as I’ve said, I’m not that sure about him and, of course, myself. 

I want to keep him to myself first. LOL. And I’ve been having fun on the side, but it doesn’t mean I’m not thinking about him. Girls just wanna have f-u-n. 

But because you’ve been asking about him, I’m going to share our moments together. You see, earlier this morning – it was so sweet – he surprised me!

He arrived early and asked me to have breakfast with him. I was like, oh my God! my hair is still standing on end. I looked like someone the cat dragged in. 

But he looked at me like I was the most beautiful woman he has seen. Aiden had this dashing smile with a rose in his hands. I wasn’t ready to go out, so I told him we were having breakfast in my place. 

So yeah, he cooked a simple yet hearty meal with eggs and bacon. It has been a long time since someone cooked for me. My heart went on overdrive, but I held my emotions. 

But the feeling of wanting to bare my heart to him? It was eating me as if I really wanted to tell him everything about me. All my needs and everything that my heart desired. I wasn’t sure if he would understand me, though.

I just want someone to accept me for who I am and love me for real. But in my quest to find the person for me, I encountered so many people that left me with a broken heart.

Anyway, let’s go back to my romantic breakfast with Aiden before I go on to talk about my failed romances.

Aiden asked me about my days⸺he went to a seminar, so we haven’t seen each other for a few days now⸺and I almost choked on my food. He asked me, and I felt a bit guilty. Well, nothing was going on between us yet, so I’m not supposed to feel this emotion. 

I told him, “I was fine. The day is the same as usual with the girls.” 

He was like, “That’s good!” 

Then we continued to talk about things… until I decided to spill the beans to Aiden and to see where we go from here.

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Got a call from another publisher…weird!

Hey Angels,

We had a few more kinks that needed a little ironing out on the site but we are like legit back up and running now.

But something weird happened. This NY publisher I knew back in my Wall Street days called me and offered me a bunch of money to basically close my store down and so they could have like the rights to my books, and said I should talk to the other store offers.

Wow. First Amazon doesn’t want me, then this big publisher wants me to close my store…I mean so they can pub me but still.

Alexis Angel doesn’t need some man…ahem yes he’s an acquisitions editor for a big pub…to like swoop in and his words

“take care of everything”

Like I thought he was going to tell me that I didn’t have to worry my pretty little head in a minute.

Didn’t he realize yesterday was international women’s day too like dude bad timing.

anyway I don’t ever want to leave you Angels and give up control of what I publish and talking to my readers. He had a lot of nerve to think I needed him.

We’re doing just fine, aren’t we?

I mean, I know the store is always growing and improving, but the answer isn’t to just let someone else take charge.

We’re a team. I of course told all the Angels and all anyone had to say was, heck noooooo this is our baby!

So yeah I was polite but firm. I’ll stick to my store, my rules.

That’s how it’s gotta be sometimes, ya know?

Happy Moanday Angels!

lol oh and when the conversation was over, about the publishing thing, he asked me what panties I was wearing. I was like, wouldn’t you like to know, and then hung up lol!!!!